The Letter

Dear Family and Friends, October, 2010

Since the holidays get so crazy and our letters never seem to make it out until late (if at all), I thought I’d take the time now to update you all on a few of the happenings in our life.

“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted” Matthew 5:4
The turn of the calendar into 2010 brought a time of reflection on 2009. It was a tough year. Twice we found ourselves mourning the loss of loved ones. Even through the fog of sadness we feel so blessed. We may not have been given the many years we would have liked to have with Kim and my dad, but we were given some wonderful memories, a steadfast godly heritage, and a challenge to carry on their legacies in a way that would bring honor to their memories and to God.

“I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11
We carried into 2010 two truths that we knew would change our lives. First was that sometime over the summer Craig’s job would be moving to eastern Michigan, and second was that we were expecting a baby around the same time as his new job would be starting. The thought of a move was somewhat welcome. I had been beginning to feel quite unsettled in my job--the stress of my work had begun to take its toll. I was ready for a change, but unsure what approach to take. Craig was stoked about the excitement of entering a new phase in his career. The idea of becoming parents was exciting and an answer to prayer. We couldn’t wait. We did our best to allow our doubts and insecurities over the changes to be turned to trust and faith that God would work out all the details. He did…but not at all by our plans. We were reminded that God tends to do things His own way and in His own time.

The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised." Job 1:21
In March Craig was attending a training session in Alabama when I spontaneously went into labor at 17 weeks. Craig immediately planned for the next flight home, but wouldn’t be able to get there until noon the following day. What took place over the next 24 hours changed everything. We learned that, although the labor had stopped and I had not yet delivered, there was little chance that the baby would survive. We were praying like we had never prayed before. Late in the evening the heartbeat remained strong and I felt a strong movement. It would be the last. After Craig arrived home the next day, March 10th our son, Christopher Job, was born silent and still.

“Some people only dream of angels. We held one in our arms” --Unknown
Our dreams were shattered and hearts were broken, but yet we were filled with peace. The way things had all played out was profoundly sad but nothing short of beautiful. The hospital and our pastors helped us to deal with this difficult blow and inspired us to embrace our son’s life and come to terms with his death in a way that left no regrets. We will never forget those precious moments with our firstborn and reflect on them often. Holding someone so tiny, perfect, beautiful, and peaceful created a feeling of deep joy that would carry us through the valley of the shadow of death once again.

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven. Ecc 3:1
With all things considered, we opted to move earlier than scheduled. In April we spent 10 days in Michigan to explore what would be our new area. To our surprise we also found and fell in love with a house, made an offer and entered contract. Our Iowa house was on the market within 3 hours of returning home. I went back to work and the rest of the summer was a whirlwind of activity trying to tie up all of the loose ends.

In June, I quit my job and began working for Bard Access Systems as a consultant. It was a great change for me and I loved the aspect of teaching nurses all over the state how to place Picc lines. With my training complete, this was also something that I could do once we had moved, which eased a lot of stress for me to have contacts already set up in Michigan.

“Children a reward from Him.” Psalm 127:3
Madison was with us for the month of July. She enjoyed a youth group work trip to Waupon, WI and was a great help in our move. As always, we enjoyed our time with her. This summer Craig and I realized that she is not a little girl anymore. Her cell phone was never far away, and she is beginning to see things with more maturity. We treasure our time with her and always wish we could have more. My niece, Brooke, joined us in Michigan for a while, too which was nice for all of us. We were able to take in a Detroit Tigers game at Comerica Park on a beautiful evening which we all really enjoyed.

“In Christ Alone my hope is found, He is my light, my strength my song. This Cornerstone, this Solid ground, Firm through the fiercest drought and storm”
--Newsboys
Late July brought devastation when we learned that my cousin Brandon died after being struck by lightening while climbing in the Grand Tetons. Once again we found ourselves walking through the valley. We made a brief trip back to Iowa for the funeral. It was heart wrenching to feel death separate us from another loved one seemingly taken all too soon, but there was also a great blessing in being able to spend time with family and share in the burden of the grief with others who share in the hope that this is not where the journey ends.

God is always working to make His children aware of a dream that remains alive beneath the rubble of every shattered dream, a new dream that when realized will release a new song, sung with tears, till God wipes them away and we sing with nothing but joy in our hearts --Larry Crabb
This has become one of my favorite quotes. July also brought tears of joy as we learned that a new song of joy was indeed forming among our shattered dreams. We are pregnant again! This was a cause of very cautious celebration. With our minds still replaying fresh images of greeting our Christopher into the world and giving him back to heaven we found that it became difficult to fully embrace the excitement. It was as if part of me was saying “If you don’t believe it, it won’t hurt if something bad happens.” All of that changed when I saw the tiny flicker of a heartbeat on that ultrasound at six weeks. I fell head over heels in love—and became scared to death.
Everything is going great. I am at 15 weeks now and feeling very good. We found a great team of doctors who are right on track with following the latest research to prevent a recurrence of March’s events. (Yes, I have done my homework and have read more medical journal research articles than you could imagine!). I meet with my regular doctor biweekly for ultrasounds and the high risk specialist once a month now. I have also been placed on modified bed rest for at least another three weeks. It is wonderful to have some down time, but I am really itching to get out and get stuff done. I will not be going back to work until after the baby is born in late March...and won’t be working much at that. Craig has been wonderfully supportive through my insecurities as I nervously analyze every little ache and pain. We are so blessed.

Our most treasured family heirlooms are our sweet family memories.--Unknown
August brought the much anticipated once-every-three year Nieuwsma family reunion. As always, it was a wonderful time of sharing and reconnecting with my dad’s siblings and my cousins. There were 84 of us there with only two plus Grandma that weren’t able to make it. I feel like I spent the entire time bawling. I missed my dad even more than usual during those days and was already drowning in emotion from the pregnancy and a few extra hormones that the doctor had prescribed. Now you all know why I could barely finish a sentence without a tissue.

We are loving our new home. There are still a few more things that we need to do to be completely settled, but it has been a good move for us this far. A little hectic, but good.
Our guest room(s) are open for visitors anytime anyone is in the Detroit area!

I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for you I pray with Joy.
--Phil 1:3-4
Finally, we would like to thank you all for all of the warm thoughts, cards, notes, and especially prayers as we’ve dealt with the ups and downs of life. If there is one thing alone that we have learned it is that true peace in difficult circumstances can only come from one source…Jesus. It is such a blessing to be a part such a wonderful community of family and friends. May you find yourself blessed and healthy through the remainder of the year and into the next.

Love to all,
Craig, Missy, and Madison.